I was speaking with a friend this morning who was doubting herself—her reaction to a situation she already knew the answer to—yet was still willing to give the offending person the benefit of the doubt. A person who, in my opinion, was way past that point and who earned all the doubt and zero benefit.
I listened and in response I said my piece, spoke my truth, and she heard me. She’s my mate and I’d never steer her wrong, but when our convo was over it left me thinking: what if, in this season — still wintering, so to speak — and not rushing to force ourselves to learn something new… we’re actually here to unlearn?
What in the world is a season of unlearning?
And nope, I don’t mean to dumb ourselves down, hide our shine, or fall into some cult when we know better. We’re not here to go backwards. But we should be here to discard past beliefs that haven’t done us a lick of good, no matter how we’ve tried to spit-and-shine them up.
Polished-up shit is still shit, babe.
Another friend, on New Year’s Day, shared this video that said to “accept people as they are but place them where they belong”. And this couldn’t have come at a better time for me or my troubled friend and I shared it with her immediately.
Remember: energy is expensive.
And draining.
Electricity, gas, hell, the sun and wind, but most important of all, you and yours!
Then why is it — and I’ve fallen bum first into this foolish trap myself — that we’re indiscriminate and treat everyone exactly how we want to be treated? Pour so heavily into others in the slimmest of hopes that they’ll do the same, when time and time again they don’t. Instead of saving our wisdom and friendship (our energy) solely for those who deserve it?
I get it, being consistent feels like the right way to be, natural even. If you have to flip your personality between people then you feel fake in a way, but that’s not the case at all. Not everyone deserves your all just because you have it in you to give.
So, this means unlearning how we share, treat, serve, and show up based on the who, what, and when.
It can also mean…
- Unlearning the habits you built just to survive.
- Unlearning the pressure to always be “on.”
- Unlearning the belief that rest means you weren’t giving your all and might, in fact, fall behind.
And what if this unlearning leaves space for more rest?
So yes, your good work from 2025 still continues. It’s happening now — quietly, intentionally, and maybe even internally.
