The very last time. Because it’s been 50–11 times now, so really, really… this is the last time. I love not only thinking about growth, but also actually growing. It’s not, nor will it ever be a perfectly straight path, but in my Big Age, the path is less curvy, less wobbly, and less riddled with self-inflicted obstacles. Paid to Learn, Paid to Leave “Lessons learned” at work is one thing. There’s more clarity there. You’ll do better with the time, budget, scope creep foolishness, or switch out the drama queen who contributed to the downfall. Simple. And believe me, I know there are those projects that will absolutely test…
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What Do You Love About the Way You
LookThink?I’ve been watching my brain lately… OK, wait… wait… hear me out. I haven’t completely lost it. I know you can’t literally watch a brain like how I watched—well, serial-inhaled—season 4 of Bridgerton, but honestly, I’m paying a heck of a lot more attention to my thoughts, and the way they feed into my reactions. And I’m loving it more and more. Too often before, my brain felt like a noisy, messy roommate that I couldn’t escape while we both worked from home… at the same company… on the same project. Now, in Big Age (and with nothing perfect, obviously), my brain is more like an enemies-to-lovers rom-com. Our beef has lessened, we…
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20 Sayings That Hit Different When You’re Growing Through Life
I hear quotes, sayings, words, and all the things any —and everywhere—in books, online, passing conversations, and some just land like solid 10. Think an Olympic gymnast who stuck the mat to screams and cheers. These sayings aren’t about hyping me up or giving me a big, gloating, bobble head. They’re more like nudges. Right-on-time ah-has, reminders, prompts, and a sprinkling of reality checks that stop me from derailing (too much), overthinking, or worse, shrinking when I shouldn’t. Spring is here. Homegirl finally parked the struggle bus, but she still needs a minute to fully step out from behind the curtain, and take center stage. We’ll give her a few…
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From 80 Degrees to Snow: The Audacity of Spring Weather
Right now, the weather has one job: pick a season.Oh, and the one to pick is spring… not extend winter, sashay into spring!Yet—here we are. Two days in a row, it was in the 80s. The very next day, literally 24-hours later, it snowed—I kid you not! Snow! Somewhere between soon-to-be blooming flowers and out-of-nowhere wind chills, winter and spring clearly have beef… and the rest of us (and our outfits) are just collateral damage, begging for the madness to stop. Meanwhile, then there’s me, outside the second the sun peeks out, acting like I can personally convince spring to woman up, clock in, and take over like the Bad…
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How To Wait for Beta Reader Feedback Like A Lunatic
I would like to begin by saying: I bloody love my beta readers! I love them deeply, respectfully, and with tons of gratitude sprinkles, smothered in whipped cream, strawberry syrup, and more sprinkles on top. And yet, I am a monster. Not only did I ask them, but I chose them specifically for their brilliance. They’re a bunch of well-rounded babes. Frequent international travelers, educated, fun-loving, solid readers, deep-thinkers… all the things. And they are reading my paper-baby for the grand total of free-99. And why? Because I am both on and driving the struggle bus in this newbie author process — aka I’m poor. They’re doing it on the…
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Take Five Minutes for the Best Case Scenario
You know what we’re exceptionally good at as humans? And I am 1000% speaking to myself on this one too: I prepare for the absolute worst. Not always successfully, mind you, but still. And I don’t just mean casually thinking about it either — I mean fully preparing. Like studying for it, taking copious notes, then taking the metaphorical exam over and over until we ace it. Like that crazy-cakes level of preparation. Brace for Impact: Our Default Setting We mentally rehearse every possible outcome where things spectacularly and catastrophically fall apart, roll off a cliff, or land somewhere between going sideways and being hella awkward. At too many points…
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100 Years of Black History Month: Gratitude, Legacy, and Love
February 2026 marks 100 years of formally celebrating Black history in the U.S.A whole century of finally saying out loud: this matters. And I just want to say to my Black American friends and fam’: thank you.For your friendship, your honesty, your humour, your patience…and for everything you’ve taught me — from the deep and meaningful…to driving on the wrong side of the road, or casually skipping the “U” in words. As a London girl with seasoned Ghanaian roots raising two beautiful Black tri-continental daughters, I’m always learning — and always in awe of the joy, brilliance, and strength that keeps showing up in you all… even now. IYKYK…Correction: IYDKWTAF! For this extra special month…
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What Happens When You Avoid the Feedback You Need
I don’t even have all the feedback yet. Just little tidbits. A few comments dropped casually over WhatsApp on the opening pages. A clarification here. A question there. A pause. A “Wait, what did you mean by…?” Enough to confirm a few things I was already side-eyeing, eye-rolling, and unhinged staring.Enough to make me feel a new kind of fear I didn’t even know about. Last week I wrote about sending my paper-baby, virgin novel, Forget The Fairytale, to my beta readers. Letting go. Resisting the urge to tweak my work to death, even though I didn’t have one more logical thing to give it. Giving it to other, yet trusted people and…
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The Trap of Over-Editing: Why “Perfect” Never Wins
In 2025, I tweaked too hard. As in editing and re-editing—because perfection got the better of me. And I know good and well: perfection is the bitchiest bitch in Bitchville. Enter: The Beta-Reader draft It’s 2026 and I’m in the phase called editing the next draft of my book, also known as the beta-reader draft. Insert quiet internal screaming. My 2024 word of the year, COMPLETE, stretched across two years and wrapped damn near at 10:21:09 PM on New Year’s Eve. I was grateful, giddy, and fully aware I could not tweak this print baby any more. It needed new, fresh reader eyes. Beta Readers: Those exciting, terrifying humans A…
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Reflecting on the Year: Being Okay With the Outcome
So maybe not all the things went as planned in 2025. Or maybe they did. Maybe the ‘good’ is just around the corner for you, in 2026. We’re not rewriting the past While we’re in our rest and reflective phase, remember we’re still wintering. We’re thinking back on 2025 not to beat ourselves up or list all the things we said we were going to do but didn’t. Nope. No apologies or shame spirals here. Instead, we’re thinking about the pivots and turns for 2026. The moments that counted Think of a few stand-out moments from 2025. Things that really went well. Maybe it was five things, three, or just…
