Quick Post, Real Reminder Separating your people into categories sounds a little calculating. Maybe even slightly evil. But honestly? I don’t give a toss (toss – UK term for don’t give a diddly-damn). At this stage of life, I think it’s more than warranted. One of the hardest lessons in Big Age is realizing that not everyone around you, and not everyone who has access to you, deserves all of you. Some people are in your life until the wheels fall off. Others are there for a season or a reason. Watch out for the season-and-reason folks. Spot them and place them where they need to be. I mean, seriously,…
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One Year of Writing: The Truth About My Good Struggle
Happy Birthday to SincerelyIreneB… yeah… me! So here we are. I made it! Twelve months of writing, blogging, posting. And I’m beyond excited about it! One whole year since I showed up to my own party, nervous but absolutely refusing to wait for the ‘Productivity Fairy’ to convince me that now was the right time to begin. One year since I typed out that first post, hit publish before I could talk myself out of it, and officially committed to Starting Sideways. So… how’d that go? Well, grab something and lemme tell ya. The Checklist, Revisited If you read my very first post, you know I showed up with a…
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Big Age, Bigger Growth | Episode 01: Keep Figuring It Out
Quick Post, Real Reminder -Sincerely, Irene B
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Are You Really Learning from the “Last Time”?
The very last time. Because it’s been 50–11 times now, so really, really… this is the last time. I love not only thinking about growth, but also actually growing. It’s not, nor will it ever be a perfectly straight path, but in my Big Age, the path is less curvy, less wobbly, and less riddled with self-inflicted obstacles. Paid to Learn, Paid to Leave “Lessons learned” at work is one thing. There’s more clarity there. You’ll do better with the time, budget, scope creep foolishness, or switch out the drama queen who contributed to the downfall. Simple. And believe me, I know there are those projects that will absolutely test…
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20 Sayings That Hit Different When You’re Growing Through Life
I hear quotes, sayings, words, and all the things any —and everywhere—in books, online, passing conversations, and some just land like solid 10. Think an Olympic gymnast who stuck the mat to screams and cheers. These sayings aren’t about hyping me up or giving me a big, gloating, bobble head. They’re more like nudges. Right-on-time ah-has, reminders, prompts, and a sprinkling of reality checks that stop me from derailing (too much), overthinking, or worse, shrinking when I shouldn’t. Spring is here. Homegirl finally parked the struggle bus, but she still needs a minute to fully step out from behind the curtain, and take center stage. We’ll give her a few…
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How To Wait for Beta Reader Feedback Like A Lunatic
I would like to begin by saying: I bloody love my beta readers! I love them deeply, respectfully, and with tons of gratitude sprinkles, smothered in whipped cream, strawberry syrup, and more sprinkles on top. And yet, I am a monster. Not only did I ask them, but I chose them specifically for their brilliance. They’re a bunch of well-rounded babes. Frequent international travelers, educated, fun-loving, solid readers, deep-thinkers… all the things. And they are reading my paper-baby for the grand total of free-99. And why? Because I am both on and driving the struggle bus in this newbie author process — aka I’m poor. They’re doing it on the…
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Take Five Minutes for the Best Case Scenario
You know what we’re exceptionally good at as humans? And I am 1000% speaking to myself on this one too: I prepare for the absolute worst. Not always successfully, mind you, but still. And I don’t just mean casually thinking about it either — I mean fully preparing. Like studying for it, taking copious notes, then taking the metaphorical exam over and over until we ace it. Like that crazy-cakes level of preparation. Brace for Impact: Our Default Setting We mentally rehearse every possible outcome where things spectacularly and catastrophically fall apart, roll off a cliff, or land somewhere between going sideways and being hella awkward. At too many points…
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100 Years of Black History Month: Gratitude, Legacy, and Love
February 2026 marks 100 years of formally celebrating Black history in the U.S.A whole century of finally saying out loud: this matters. And I just want to say to my Black American friends and fam’: thank you.For your friendship, your honesty, your humour, your patience…and for everything you’ve taught me — from the deep and meaningful…to driving on the wrong side of the road, or casually skipping the “U” in words. As a London girl with seasoned Ghanaian roots raising two beautiful Black tri-continental daughters, I’m always learning — and always in awe of the joy, brilliance, and strength that keeps showing up in you all… even now. IYKYK…Correction: IYDKWTAF! For this extra special month…
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What Happens When You Avoid the Feedback You Need
I don’t even have all the feedback yet. Just little tidbits. A few comments dropped casually over WhatsApp on the opening pages. A clarification here. A question there. A pause. A “Wait, what did you mean by…?” Enough to confirm a few things I was already side-eyeing, eye-rolling, and unhinged staring.Enough to make me feel a new kind of fear I didn’t even know about. Last week I wrote about sending my paper-baby, virgin novel, Forget The Fairytale, to my beta readers. Letting go. Resisting the urge to tweak my work to death, even though I didn’t have one more logical thing to give it. Giving it to other, yet trusted people and…
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The Trap of Over-Editing: Why “Perfect” Never Wins
In 2025, I tweaked too hard. As in editing and re-editing—because perfection got the better of me. And I know good and well: perfection is the bitchiest bitch in Bitchville. Enter: The Beta-Reader draft It’s 2026 and I’m in the phase called editing the next draft of my book, also known as the beta-reader draft. Insert quiet internal screaming. My 2024 word of the year, COMPLETE, stretched across two years and wrapped damn near at 10:21:09 PM on New Year’s Eve. I was grateful, giddy, and fully aware I could not tweak this print baby any more. It needed new, fresh reader eyes. Beta Readers: Those exciting, terrifying humans A…
