We’re more than halfway through October. How?! Wasn’t it hot-as-balls, boob-sweat-dripping, this summer… like just last week? I took a lovely lazy walk this week, well a few here and there really, for some fresh air and to focus on nothing in particular. But the one around a lake near me was peak calmness. And though it’s close to some restaurants, a spa, and a few shops, you still get that “Look at me, all in nature, but not too in nature, like close enough to be surrounded by a herd of bison” feeling (I’m looking at you K-Dubs!) And it was just the reminder I needed to slow down,…
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Your Life Is Not Public Property: Keep Things Private
How did we stumble into thinking being open was the same as being accessible? You are allowed to keep things private. Especially as women. We’re constantly encouraged to “share our story,” “be authentic,” “show up as your true self,” and apparently that also means to yell into the internet about what we ate for breakfast, retell the story about keying an ex’s car that we told our therapist, and exactly what we’re doing with the rest of our lives. Umm… no. And that’s allegedly keyed an ex’s car. A lot of what’s happening or has happened in our lives should be kept private. Or, at the most, kept within our…
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Be Less Helpful: Goodbye to People-Pleasing
Huh? What? Yep, I can see you all already, through the internet even, head shaking, face scrunched up, like ‘IreneB, are you OK? This sounds bloody awful? I wasn’t raised that way!’ I get it. Neither was I. But times they are a changing… to quote Bob Dylan. Get with it. Be less helpful. It sounds and feels hella mean, like I’m actively working to sway the good people of the world into becoming the terrible ones. The ones who not only watch but take pleasure in watching others struggle, complete with a side of hot, buttery popcorn as they do it. No. I still and will always believe in…
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The Beauty In Actively Creating A Good And Slower Life
It’s summer. And yes, I love, love, love, summer. But 2026 summer? She gots to go! There’s hot and then there’s 2026 balls-and-boob-sweat hot… and it’s everywhere. The globe is basically boiling, and honestly, moving quickly right now feels like a personal attack. The ‘prison-style shank’ kind of attack. On too many days these past few months, walking outside feels like stepping into Satan’s pizza oven. We’re done, we’re crispy, yet someone keeps turning up the dial. For the love of God, turn it off! Then only to have to dip into an office building or store, and in under three seconds after sliding through the doors, we’re held hostage…
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Over Explaining: When Being Clear Turns Into Begging
I have always considered myself a pretty clear person. No tap-dancing around an issue or request, but not brutally clear either, I’m not the kind of person who walks into a room, drops a verbal grenade, and then calls it “well, I’m just being honest.” I literally can’t stand the way some deliver that response. There’s a difference between being direct and being downright disrespectful. But I also don’t think you should need to channel a psychic, decode ancient hieroglyphics, or hire a professional translator to figure out what I mean. I’m pretty sure if I say something, I have actually said something. With words and in English. Wild concept, I know.…
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Big Age, Bigger Growth | Episode 03: It’s OK to Disappoint People
Quick Post, Real Reminder Separating your people into categories sounds a little calculating. Maybe even slightly evil. But honestly? I don’t give a toss (toss – UK term for don’t give a diddly-damn). At this stage of life, I think it’s more than warranted. One of the hardest lessons in Big Age is realizing that not everyone around you, and not everyone who has access to you, deserves all of you. Some people are in your life until the wheels fall off. Others are there for a season or a reason. Watch out for the season-and-reason folks. Spot them and place them where they need to be. I mean, seriously,…
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Doughlene: A Sourdough Tragedy in Three Acts
(A short story by Irene B.) “T-minus three hours!” Popped up Denise’s text, breaking my once chill morning of scrolling. That was how much time I had before I was supposed to bake my very first loaf of sourdough bread. This is what I get for trying to support a friend… a mate. This is what I get for greedily eating every piece and version of the delicious offering my mate, Krissy, makes. Now here’s me, enrolled in a five-plus-hour class. I blame my stomach. Then Denise adds, all casual and shit. “Who’s excited to make bread?” Immediately my stomach dropped, and a loud “fuck” slipped past my lips, but I hearted her comment. Nikki: “Wait, so we’re starting…
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You Need A Bigger World: How To Stop Letting Small Stuff Consume You
That statement, or idea, might seem too simple on paper, but give me a few minutes to explain what I mean. Then you can go ahead and poo-poo it if it still doesn’t fit. Think of that feeling when you’re stuck. Like you’re not making progress, not even a little bit. Or worse, you feel completely out of control. Your mind starts drifting into places it has no business being, and before you know it, you’ve become consumed by someone else’s foolishness. OK, I’ll give you an example of my own. I planned to edit a key chapter. Or maybe it was a blog post, or a note, even. I’d…
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The Right Cake
(A short story by Irene B.) Kira stood in the long, winding pickup line at Bake My Day bakery, already late and already irritated. Her thick, mid-length hair was pulled into a neat, low bun, with loose curls escaping just enough to brush her warm brown cheeks. The place should have been fast. It always was when she wanted a quick sneaky treat, no latte needed, which meant she could skip the second line for the custom, overly complicated orders. She’d placed the cake order last week for pickup today. In the past, it took a few extra minutes to add in a few more sprinkles, encouraged by the competent…
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The Version of You That Made ‘That Choice’ Wasn’t Lost
Every Version of You Was Working With What It Had Now that I’ve been seeing, literally on repeat, more posts, comments, thought bubbles on this, I’m more locked in and convinced I’m on a solid path where I need to stay honed on understanding behaviors and patterns not just in myself but in others. You know, like, and I’m sure there’s a name for this theory, when you love the look of a particular silver car, then all of a sudden, you see that very car like everywhere, multiple times. And not in that stalking way where every internet-tracking, nosy algorithm suddenly decides that’s all you’re interested in, now pops…
