Year after year, there’s something about the colder months that really jack up the volume on everything inside me. It’s not just the weather, though the dark mornings and darker evenings don’t help. It’s the year winding down, the calendar screaming “four weeks left!”, “shit, no, three weeks left!” or whatever it is. Then Suddenly, everything feels like it’s on an express countdown clock.
And then my brain decides to choose chaos
As my brain dodges the reflective positive laps, and everything I wanted, everything I promised, and every passion project I committed to finishing, loops louder. And all those “this year I’ll…’” moments play on repeat—when I never asked it to.
I just know I’m not alone.
The cold and the darkness make it louder. Sharper. Sharper and louder. You’re not outside as much. You don’t get that lift of light, or warmth, or movement. Everything funnels inward. And because it’s quieter outside, it’s louder inside.
You start thinking about what you could’ve done differently in June. In February. In that random Tuesday in April when you chose one thing and said no to another. And once that replay starts, it loops. And loops. And loops.
Then the negative thoughts sneak in. Slowly at first. Then they barge in.
Those half-finished dreams. The things you didn’t complete. The timelines you set and didn’t stick to. Suddenly it feels like there’s not much time left to fix anything. The cold amplifies it. The darkness amplifies it. Heck, the quiet really amplifies it.
It’s bloody exhausting.
And on top of all that, the doubt creeps in. Doubt about your path. Your pace. Your value. Whether you did enough. Whether you changed enough. Or whether you moved at all. The “should’ve done more” chatter starts creeping in and at times starts ringing like an old-school alarm clock you can’t quickly shut off. Oh, and did I mention, all of this on top of already being tired.
And don’t get me started on the ‘Comparison-Olympics’ of it all.
The ‘Dare-to-Compare’ Trap
You’re bombarded online seeing people posting their end-of-year wins, their neat little summaries, and tidy wrap-ups. And then there are your friends, some who hit their goals, some who didn’t. And you’re happy for them. Cheer them on, genuinely. And when they confess to you some of their losses, here you go shutting down any of their negativity, like the badass friend you are. You don’t judge them the way you judge or drag yourself. Would never think to hold them to the same harsh standards you use on your own life.
Isn’t it wild how we show grace to everyone but can’t as easily manage it for ourselves?
Insert a reminder for when the doubt gets too disrespectful
Now is not the time to shrink just because it’s the end of the year. Don’t soften or dim down because December feels heavy. The calendar year ending ain’t got nothing to do with you, and certainly does not mean you have to call it quits or mark anything as a fail because here comes the 31st.
Side Step: I am so glad that I let my 2024 Word of the Year stretch to a second year because it allowed me to actually get done what I wanted so badly to do. And I’ll talk more about word of the year(s) in a post later that’s coming up soon. This super valuable ‘thing’ that a friend of mine introduced to me. I tested it out for a couple of years to make sure it would be something that stuck with me, and boy, did it! And for 2025, if I had picked another word, I honestly don’t know if I would have been able to accomplish what I wanted to do. By the way, that word was ‘COMPLETE’.
Your progress didn’t expire in December
So…
- If you started something, keep going.
- If it’s half-baked, but still good, pick it back up.
- If it didn’t work, chuck it out and move on to the next.
Nothing needs to be perfect by New Year’s Eve. Some things just need to survive December.
And don’t forget the things you actually did do. The three out of ten on your goal list that you actually finished earlier in the year. Maybe they were smaller, and by now you’ve somehow forgotten that creative spark that got you to the finish line. But they mattered then, and they still do now. You quietly celebrated them when you crossed them off. Remember that feeling? That was very real. The other ones you didn’t quite get to? That’s okay. Pick them back up if they still mean something to you. Stopping is the only thing not okay.
You may have made mistakes this year. Fine. We all did. But don’t label the whole year as wasted. Don’t let the cold trick you into thinking you’re stagnant when really you’re just tired.
This is a season. Not a final verdict.
- Protect your sanity and your energy. You’re gonna need it.
- Grow slowly.
- Heal and rest quietly.
- But let yourself continue into the next year, season, and version of you.
Think of this time as cozy, yet still renewing. The end of the year is just a date on a calendar. It’s not the end of anything for you. You’re still becoming. And there’s still time.
