As promised from my Tuesday post: Why “Good Human” Energy Matters — Now More Than Ever, here’s my list.
No sugarcoating. No “perfect human” checklist — just a handful of things I try (and sometimes fumble) to show up a little better each day. Maybe you’ll see yourself in some. Maybe you’ll roll your eyes at a few. Either way, it’s real, and I welcome any ones you have.
1-20… Let’s go!
1. Be Around People Who Push You To Be An Even-Better You
You might not have a ton of friends — but you have the right ones. Mentors, peers, and people who call you out (lovingly) when needed. You do the same. Whoever’s wrong gets told so — and why. Advice isn’t always sweet, but it should always be right.
2. Enjoy Your Own Company
Your own company, that is. You don’t always need to be “on” or surrounded. You don’t bore you — and that’s growth.
3. Challenge Your Self-Beliefs (and Own Your Shit)
You’re open to having your mind — and old beliefs — changed with truth. And when you realize you’ve messed up, you don’t hide from it. Whether it’s your own reflection or someone you trust pointing it out, you take it, reflect, and do better next time.
4. Prioritize Your Physical, Mental, and Emotional Well-Being
Not an easy one, because life starts life-ing too many bloody times. But you don’t stop. This isn’t a one-and-done deal — it’s ongoing. And that’s not a bad thing.
5. Stay True to You (Boundaries Included)
You’ve learned that boundaries aren’t optional. You don’t go along to get along (and work doesn’t count — those bills won’t pay themselves). “But they’re family” gives you the ick. Blood doesn’t excuse bad behavior. Not dealing with nonsense — even family nonsense — isn’t deflection. It’s peace.
6. Keep Learning and Unlearning
Learning is lifelong, and not limited to books or “Einstein-level” people. It can come from your kids, coworkers, a podcast, or the cashier with unexpected wisdom. Stay open, especially to those who grew up differently than you.
7. Practice Gratitude in All Things Big and Small
It’s not cliché if you mean it. Gratitude leads to growth, self-awareness, and the kind of resilience that keeps you upright when life’s a mess.
8. Avoid Unnecessary Drama
Because who has the time? You’re not a punk, but you’re a classy cuss-a-bitch-out-er. Time and place, people. Time and place.
9. Be Flexible, Not Flaky
Plans change. Feelings shift. Being able to pivot, not panic, when things don’t go as planned is a quiet kind of power.
10. Choose Your Own Happiness (Even When It’s Hard)
You might not always nail this one, but you’re aware of it and working on it. You can’t pour from empty, and you’re done pretending otherwise.
11. Stop Labeling Every Wrong Move a “Mistake”
Not every bad call was a disaster. Some were simply decisions made with the information you had at the time. You own them, learn from them, and move on.
12. Be Vulnerable — With the Right People
Admitting your fears, flaws, or questionable decisions doesn’t make you weak — it makes you real. Vulnerability with the wrong people burns you; with the right ones, it heals you.
13. Know Where to Put Your Energy
Some things deserve your full effort. Others deserve a smile, a nod, and a silent walk away. Learning the difference is half the peace you’ve been searching for.
14. Practice What You Preach (or at Least Try To)
You catch yourself when you don’t, then course-correct. You’re not chasing perfection; you’re staying consistent, and that’s the real work.
15. Keep Becoming
It means showing up for yourself, staying open, forgiving often, and laughing when possible. You’re not trying to be perfect but just better than you were last time.
16. Your Tolerance Has Changed (and That’s Growth)
You’ve changed, and your tolerance has, too. That person might be the same, but you’re not. The way you see and experience things is different now. “They don’t mean it; it’s just who they are”? That used to fly before, time after time, in fact. But not anymore. They can stay the same — you’re just done pretending it still works for you.
17. Move On and Forgive (or Dismiss) in Silence
You don’t need to make a scene to make a point. Keep your peace and let them move in anger if they need to. They can rewrite the story all they want — you both know the truth. Kill ’em with kindness? Nah. Kill ’em with silence.
18. Know the Difference Between ‘Sorry’ and a Real Apology
“Sorry” is a filler word. I read a long time ago that a real apology has three parts: owning the hurt, explaining how it won’t happen again (with a good reason why), and making sure it never does. One’s just noise. The other’s growth.
19. Only Care About What Cares About You
Your energy’s too valuable to waste. Giving is good — especially to those who need and deserve it — but pouring into people who don’t pour back? Fuck no! No thanks. Shitty people, run along.
20. Match Energy
You don’t have to see people all the time to feel connected; the right ones fill your cup every time, and you do the same. The rest? Match their exchange. No drama, just balance. Stop seeing people for their potential — which I now firmly believe is just your own projection of what you want for them. See them for who they show you they are. Right here and right now.
So, which ones are you? Hella dramatic? Strangely relatable? Or just right?
